Funny Times

This has got to be one of the best singles ads ever printed. It appeared in The Otago Daily Times.

SINGLE BLACK FEMALE
Seeks male companionship, ethnicity unimportant. I'm a very good looking girl who LOVES to play.
I love long walks in the woods, riding in your Ute, hunting, camping and Duck shooting, cozy nights lying by the fire. Candlelight dinners will have me eating out of your hand. Rub me the right way and watch me respond. I'll be at the front door when you get home from work, wearing only what nature gave me. Kiss me and I'm yours. Call (03) 475-6420 and ask for Daisy.

Over 15,000 men found themselves talking to the Otago branch of the SPCA about an 8-week old black Labrador retriever. Men are so easy.

Things we can learn from a dog

Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joy ride. When a loved one comes home, always run to greet them. Take naps, and stretch before rising. Be loyal. Never pretend you're something you're not. When somebody is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by, and nuzzle them gently. Avoid biting when a growl will do. When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body. Bond with your pack. Allow the experiences of fresh air and wind in your face to be pure ecstasy. Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.

Cat's motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it.

When it's raining cats and dogs, be sure not to step in the poodles.